Summary of “The Science Behind Happy and Healthy Relationships”

There’s no denying it: making and keeping happy and healthy relationships is hard.
A growing field of research into relationships is increasingly providing science-based guidance into the habits of the healthiest, happiest couples – and how to make any struggling relationship better.
As we’ve learned, the science of love and relationships boils down to fundamental lessons that are simultaneously simple, obvious and difficult to master: empathy, positivity and a strong emotional connection drive the happiest and healthiest relationships.
“The most important thing we’ve learned, the thing that totally stands out in all of the developmental psychology, social psychology and our lab’s work in the last 35 years is that the secret to loving relationships and to keeping them strong and vibrant over the years, to falling in love again and again, is emotional responsiveness,” says Sue Johnson, a clinical psychologist in Ottawa and the author of several books, including Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love.
According to Carrie Cole, director of research for the Gottman Institute, an organization dedicated to the research of marriage, emotional disengagement can easily happen in any relationship when couples are not doing things that create positivity.
In happy relationships, partners try to empathize with each other and understand each other’s perspectives instead of constantly trying to be right.
Ultimately, the quality of a person’s relationships dictates the quality of their life.
“Good relationships aren’t just happier and nicer,” says Johnson.

The orginal article.