Summary of “Why You Need Emotional Intelligence To Succeed In Business”

“Emotional intelligence, as we described it, is the capacity to reason about emotions and emotional information, and of emotions to enhance thought. People with high EI, we believed, could solve a variety of emotion-related problems accurately and quickly.”
Identify Your Emotions Daniel Goleman, another EI pioneer, and the author of Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, argues that we have two minds.
If you don’t journal, start doing it for the sake of EI. The first step is to identify how you feel and what triggers your emotions.
Interpret Your Emotions Once you have a better picture of how you respond to different situations in life, it’s time to understand them.
Manage Your Emotions This is a big part of succeeding in business.
I’ve applied the above 3-step method to improve my ability to identify my own emotions.
What you will find is this: When you can identify your own emotions, you will also get better at identifying other people’s emotions.
A real leader knows the emotions of another person better than the person himself.

The orginal article.

Summary of “Why You Need Emotional Intelligence To Succeed In Business”

“Emotional intelligence, as we described it, is the capacity to reason about emotions and emotional information, and of emotions to enhance thought. People with high EI, we believed, could solve a variety of emotion-related problems accurately and quickly.”
Identify Your Emotions Daniel Goleman, another EI pioneer, and the author of Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ, argues that we have two minds.
If you don’t journal, start doing it for the sake of EI. The first step is to identify how you feel and what triggers your emotions.
Interpret Your Emotions Once you have a better picture of how you respond to different situations in life, it’s time to understand them.
Manage Your Emotions This is a big part of succeeding in business.
I’ve applied the above 3-step method to improve my ability to identify my own emotions.
What you will find is this: When you can identify your own emotions, you will also get better at identifying other people’s emotions.
A real leader knows the emotions of another person better than the person himself.

The orginal article.

Summary of “4 Common Reasons Husbands Resent Their Wife”

Here’s the complicated brew of feelings actually at play when you feel like you hate your wife, according to experts, and what to do if you want to save your relationship.
“Every long term relationship has the opportunity to become a breeding ground for resentment, hurt feelings, anger, disappointments,” says Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby, marriage counselor, therapist, and life coach.
Bobby points out that many wives resent their husbands because “They often feel frazzled, frustrated, and resentful about the higher level of mental energy and material energy they are expected to devote to their household, career and families.” That can leave her little room for some soul-replenishing me-time, let alone you-and-she time.
“Male anger tends to be rooted not in frustration over tasks and responsibilities, but in a longing for love, fun, meaning, and a desire for a deeper connection with their partner. All of which they feel increasingly cut off from.”
“What I’ve often seen in my marriage counseling and couples therapy practice is that men are more likely than women to feel emotionally neglected by their partners,” Bobby says.
“When men lose any sense of their value, the feeling of failure or inadequacy can seep into everything,” D’Angelo continues.
“For women, the first step is often understanding, sometimes for the first time, that their husbands are just as in need of love, affection, and compassion as they are. Many women I talk to have little awareness that their husbands are craving hugs and kisses, time and attention, empathy, and to simply feel like they’re enjoying each other.”
Feeling too angry to even know where to begin talking to your wife about it? D’Angelo says seeing a therapist on your own is the best place to start.

The orginal article.

Summary of “Get closer to the people in your life by being the best mess possible |”

It’s time to give up on chasing perfection and embrace our uniquely individual quirks and imperfections, says author Chidera Eggerue.
We humans are pretty excellent at telling other people what to do – but not so excellent at following our own advice.
Case in point: When friends and family confide they’re anxious about what to say or do at a party, most of us tell them, “Just be yourself! People will love you.”
Recent research shows everything we stand to gain from adopting this attitude.
Inspired by BrenĂ© Brown’s work on vulnerability, a study from psychology researchers at the University of Mannheim, Germany, examined the “Beautiful mess effect.” In a set of studies, they presented subjects with hypothetical fraught situations, which included confessing romantic feelings to a friend, admitting a mistake at work, and being the first to apologize after arguing with one’s partner.
After reading detailed depictions, participants assessed how they’d feel if they saw another person reveal their vulnerability in these scenarios – and how they’d feel if they were the ones revealing vulnerability.
The results: “Even when such examples of showing vulnerability might sometimes feel more like weakness from the inside, our findings indicate that, to others, these acts might look more like courage from the outside,” the researchers wrote.
By being our best possible messes, not only can we quit pursuing perfection, we can also build greater trust and closeness in our personal and professional relationships.

The orginal article.

Summary of “We’ve Reached Peak Wellness. Most of It Is Nonsense.”

Emotional: Don’t Hide Your Feelings, Get Help When You Need It. Another big issue with what passes for modern-day wellness is that it creates the impression that everyone is happy all the time and that you should be, too.
A recent poll from the market research company YouGov found that 30 percent of millennials say they feel lonely and 22 percent said they have zero friends.
People with fit mindsets tend to overemphasize their initial feelings, search for perfection, and quit when the going gets tough.
An app called Track Your Happiness has allowed thousands of people to report their feelings in real time.
A study published earlier this year in JAMA Network Open found that people without a strong life purpose-defined as a sense of feeling rooted in your life and taking actions toward meaningful goals-were more than twice as likely to die between the years of the study compared with people who had one, even after controlling for things like gender, race, wealth, and education level.
The work of Dacher Keltner, a professor of psychology at the University of California at Berkeley, has shown time and time again that experiencing awe-watching a beautiful sunset, listening to moving music, witnessing a master at their craft-leads to self-transcendence and feelings of spiritual connection.
Worship your own body and beauty and sexual allure, and you will always feel ugly, and when time and age start showing, you will die a million deaths before they finally plant you.
On a macro level, ask yourself these questions: Do I live in a place that feels unlivable? Does my commute totally suck my soul? I’m aware that I’ve got a lot of privilege to suggest moving geographically, but the kind of move I’m suggesting is one away from crazily expensive, competitive, and congested cities.

The orginal article.

Summary of “How to Recognize Anxiety-Induced Procrastination”

Sometimes people get anxious about completing tasks they have a lot of experience with, particularly if some time has passed since the last time they did the task, if the stakes are higher, or the evaluation of their work will take a different form than it usually does.
To identify tasks that fall into this category, think about the basic skills involved in a task, like filling in a form or studying for a test, even if the particulars or domains are different.
You might not feel nervous about all aspects of a task, but perhaps you feel nervous about just one aspect or a few aspects.
In these scenarios, people sometimes label themselves as being anxious about a task globally when 90% of the steps they’re not anxious about.
You feel resentment about doing aspects of a task that feel like a waste of time, or when you need to comply with a system or procedures that don’t feel logical, fair, or caring.
This can cause a task that might be quite manageable if kept at a reasonable scale to feel completely overwhelming and trigger procrastination.
Often the anxious person doesn’t see that the way they’re approaching a task is over the top compared to how most people would approach it.
For me, I often find that exercise helps me cope during weeks in which I’m doing tasks that trigger my anxiety.

The orginal article.

Summary of “After Violence Like Mass Shootings, How Do We Heal And Move Forward?”

After Violence Like Mass Shootings, How Do We Heal And Move Forward? : Shots – Health News If recent violent events have left you upset and scared, you’re not alone.
There are ways to help yourselves and those you love overcome fear and move forward.
Rian Finney, 16, knows the feeling of vulnerability all too well.
Finney’s ability to make meaning out of the misery of violence is an effective way to cope, says Vickburg, whether you have a personal connection to the recent mass shootings, have other experiences with trauma, or are just feeling distressed by the climate of violence today.
After a traumatic event it can take time to feel safer and to slowly notice what helps you feel better.
“These give me an extra push if I’m feeling down,” Finney says.
Did someone hold open a door for you or greet you warmly? Notice and embrace how this act of kindness makes you feel.
Take time to notice at each step how those thoughts make you feel in the moment.

The orginal article.

Summary of “Here’s How to Get Over Social Media Obligation”

Social media has become our go-to connector, helping us stay in touch with long distance family and friends, generating job leads, or rekindling romantic relationships.
Because of this, there is a weird obligation that comes along with actively participating in social networks that can make it feel like a chore.
So how can we make sure social media feeds us instead of sucking us dry? Dallas-based clinical psychologist Lillian Gibson, Ph.D suggests adding more structure to your social media presence and activity.
“For most people, if they’re on social media for a relaxation tool or a connection tool, I would really recommend that they filter what they want to be on social media for,” Gibson says.
Ask yourself: How long am I am going to be on? What is going to be the purpose and intent of being on social media? Knowing why you’re there will lead to more meaningful connections that result in less forced interactions.
Use social media features to do your dirty workIf unfriending an old acquaintance causes anxiety, there’s an easier way out.
“Some people don’t want to be rude, so take advantage of those social media options to snooze pages as well,” Gibson suggests.
While social media can feel overwhelming, I’m not suggesting you become a grouch.

The orginal article.

Summary of “Research Reveals a Surprising Solution for Anxiety”

The stresses of contemporary life contribute to our anxiety, according to neurosurgeon James R. Doty, M.D., director of Stanford University’s Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education.
A surprising solution to all this stress and anxiety is compassion, “An open-hearted way of relating to the world that responds to the suffering of others with care, kindness, and helpful action”.
Research has shown that cultivating compassion for ourselves and others can relieve stress.
Cultivating compassion helps relieve stress by reframing the way we see the world.
Research has shown that compassion is incredibly good for our health.
Dr. Doty says that by developing greater compassion, love, and acceptance, “You shift into your parasympathetic nervous system, the executive control function works its best, your decision-making works its best. You’re much more open, thoughtful, and inclusive.”
A little more compassion can make a major difference in your life.
If you’re feeling anxious and stressed, can you stop, take a few deep mindful breaths, and begin feeling a deeper sense of compassion for yourself and those around you?

The orginal article.

Summary of “Should I Just Give Up On Saving Money?”

Your letter basically describes my 20s. In my early adult life, thinking about money felt like pouring molasses into my skull – words would slide into trombone whomps and simple math suddenly looked like parallax formulas.
To find out what you’re missing, I called Dr. Pauline Rose Clance, the psychologist who coined the term “Imposter phenomenon” back in the ’70s. “What you’re describing happens to a lot of people who are bright and competent but hold onto beliefs that they have certain inadequacies,” she says.
“If you were my patient, I’d ask you to think about the origin of that belief – who gave you the message that you’d be bad with money in the first place?”.
Look at online budget tools, read a book or two on personal finance, and/or enlist a friend or mentor to help you fumble through the first uneasy steps of figuring out what you could be doing better.
Even now, whenever my spending gets out of hand, I revisit that tactic as a way to regroup.
In my experience, seeing your cash flow written out on paper makes it more concrete and controllable.
“We often catastrophize or pathologize certain tendencies that are normal, or aren’t as bad as we think.” She points out that you criticized yourself for spending money on housing, lunches, and clothes – which are all necessities.
Could you be spending less on those things? Possibly, but it’s not like you’re out shopping for diamonds while your rent check bounces.

The orginal article.