Summary of “This is what being in love looks like”

In 2017, to find joy once more, she decided to go on a road trip across France, asking random strangers to share their most defining and life-changing love stories with her.
Yann: “Alexandre and I met on Facebook through friends. We then talked on Skype for two months and we fell in love. Alexandre was kicked out of his house and he came to live with me and my family. My parents were not aware that we were in love or that I was gay. But my mother guessed it, because we were looking at each other lovingly. One day she searched my room and found all the letters we wrote each other. In my family, we don’t speak about our feelings. She had a hard time accepting it. The day she gave me her blessing, I immediately asked Alexandre to marry me. We got married two weeks ago. We are the second gay couple to get married in Elbeuf!”.
Alexandre: “I decided to take Yann’s last name. I am completely estranged from my family except for my father, but he died in April. I was brought up in a foster family who I’ve since taken to court for mistreatment. And when I finally went back to my mother’s house, she ended up throwing me out because I was gay. Today, I am at peace. With Yann, I feel confident. I love Yann’s body and his childish side. I am always doing little things for him, like every night, I pour him a bath with candles, and I bring him breakfast in bed. We want at least four children.”
“He had the reputation of being a great charmer. All the girls wanted him. He would always go out with end-of-the-line duchesses, or dancers with long legs. I, on the other hand, was a tiny girl with no money. He made accessories for a circus company, and I was an equestrian performer. I would go naked on the horse’s back, stand on it, or ride sidesaddled. I fell in love with him because I wanted security. But it turned out to be the opposite: he harassed me mentally and physically, and denigrated me as an artist. I directed comedians and acrobats, but he would go behind my back to tell them my artistic direction was all wrong. He would break everything I did.”
“I think I’m an inveterate romantic. I could fall in love so easily. I would love to raise a second child. I have been given the green light to adopt one.”
“The problem when you are 17 and that you fall in love with an older man is that you ask yourself: do I have a psychological problem? Do I have an oedipal complex?”.
“I am with Katia now. She is from Paris. She is a good person. I met her when she was 17 and I was 25. She was my employee. She loved me, but it wasn’t reciprocal. I was with someone else at the time. And we spent 30 years without seeing each other. But we met again and we got married 10 years ago. I never got married with the others. Why? Because they didn’t ask. She just had an operation, so she is in Paris, resting. Do I love her? I don’t know. Love is a weird word. I care about Katia. That must be love. She cares about me too – a bit too much.”
“It wasn’t love at first sight with Thierry. His web profile was too perfect, and a lot of men had lied to me. He said he cooked; he doesn’t. But he does do the cleaning. He tells me he loves me, that he thinks I am pretty. We can’t live without each other. It has been two years.”

The orginal article.

Summary of “What Movie Has the Most Peak Performances?”

Some projects are lucky enough to cast a group of actors who peak at the same time and each deliver career-best performances.
Inspired by a tweet regarding The Talented Mr. Ripley’s window, staff members of The Ringer were asked to submit which movie they think captured the most peak performances from a group of actors.
Frances McDormand is in peak shape no matter what the movie-but her performance as the formidable, worrying, god-save-my-child loving Elaine Miller may be my favorite of hers.
Independence Day Michael Baumann: It’s no surprise that one of the five greatest works of 20th-century American cinema would be so stuffed to the gills with great performances.
Harry Connick Jr. was robbed of Best Supporting Actor in a loaded field that included Cuba Gooding Jr. in Jerry Maguire and William H. Macy in Fargo; Bill Pullman delivered the most moving monologue since Hamlet and the best American presidential speech since JFK dared us to go to the moon; even Brent Spiner, whose peak is undoubtedly Star Trek: The Next Generation, may never have delivered a better performance in a film.
Mulholland Drive Miles Surrey: David Lynch’s masterwork has a trifecta of performances that remain the best the actors have ever delivered, all for different reasons.
While basically all of those actors have given more iconic performances throughout their careers, their complicated, empathetic, and hilarious work in this movie qualifies as their best.
Somewhere along the way of Malkovich playing John Cusack, Cameron Diaz, and a bunch of other strangers inside his own body-not to mention a trippy scene when every single person in a crowded restaurant is Malkovich saying “Malkovich” over and over-he delivered a signature performance to match the stakes of being in a movie with your own name in the title.

The orginal article.

Summary of “Philosopher Martin Buber on Love and What It Means to Live in the Present – Brain Pickings”

“Love is the quality of attention we pay to things,” poet J.D. McClatchy wrote seven decades after the brilliant and underappreciated philosopher Simone Weil observed that “Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.”
The type of attention that makes for generous and unselfish love is what the Austrian-born Israeli Jewish philosopher Martin Buber examined in I and Thou – the 1923 existentialist masterpiece in which Buber laid out his visionary relation modality that makes us real to one another.
Love, Buber argues, is something larger than affect – not a static feeling, but a dynamic state of being lived in the present.
Feelings accompany the metaphysical and metapsychical fact of love, but they do not constitute it Feelings are “Entertained”: love comes to pass.
Love does not cling to the I in such a way as to have the Thou only for its “Content,” its object; but love is between I and Thou.
The man who does not know this, with his very being know this, does not know love; even though he ascribes to it the feelings he lives through, experiences, enjoys, and expresses Love is responsibility of an I for a Thou.
In this lies the likeness – impossible in any feeling whatsoever – of all who love, from the smallest to the greatest and from the blessedly protected man, whose life is rounded in that of a loved being, to him who is all his life nailed to the cross of the world, and who ventures to bring himself to the dreadful point – to love all men.
Complement this particular portion with Adrienne Rich on how honorable relationships refine our truths, Erich Fromm on what is keeping us from mastering the art of loving, and a lovely illustrated meditation on the many meanings and manifestations of love.

The orginal article.

Summary of “Romantic Comedies Are Having a Moment Again-All Thanks to Netflix”

There’s a moment in the upcoming Netflix film Sierra Burgess Is a Loser, about 40 minutes in, that will feel very familiar if you’ve ever seen an early Channing Tatum movie.
Vulture refuted this claim in 2017, arguing that romantic comedies aren’t dead-they’re just changing.
During the past year the streaming giant has released seven original movies that have the glossy sheen of a 2003 romantic comedy, minus the offensive tropes.
The dialogue in Sierra Burgess Is a Loser would’ve easily worked in a Molly Ringwald movie from 1985, as would the plot twist at the end of The Kissing Booth or the dad-on-dad shenanigans from The Week Of. At their core, these movies are capital R-C Romantic Comedies.
“It’s pretty simple: We want to make more of what our members want to watch. And we’ve seen that our members around the world are watching a lot of rom coms,” a representative for Netflix told Glamour in an email.
That’s very true: Netflix’s new slate of romantic films will make viewers quite happy, but they’re not escapist fluff.
The platform will also premiere two more romantic films this summer: Like Father, starring Kristen Bell and Seth Rogen, and The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society with Lily James.
“I think love should be multicultural. I would like to see more romantic comedies-there are several out right now-that are [about] a gay couple or a mixed-race couple. I think all of those stories should come out, and I hope there’s a time where [there] can be romantic comedies about people who are really different-opposites attracting-and it’s not about the fact they’re black and white or lesbian or gay. That it’s just a story about love.”

The orginal article.

Summary of “Envy can poison love, but it can also nourish growth”

No love is immune from envy, despite St Paul’s contention that ‘Love does not envy’.
Aristotle anticipated a conclusion reached by contemporary social psychology: there can be no envy in the absence of equality between the envier and the envied.
We do envy our beloveds, and the reason is not only that we are drawn to love and envy for the same reasons, but also that love and envy thrive in the same conditions of similarity and equality.
Every moment in which they rejoice in each other’s company, in which they share their love for dance and engage in their favourite activity, is also an occasion for envy to rear its ugly head: for one to notice that the other is more talented than she is.
Lenù is the narrative voice, and she often talks of both her own envy toward Lila, and Lila’s envy toward her.
Envy can be an opportunity for the lovers’, and love’s, growth.
The coexistence of love and envy is the consequence of deeply seated features of human nature.
Once we accept that envy is the dark side of love, we come to see that love is the luminous side of envy.

The orginal article.

Summary of “Kahlil Gibran on the Courage to Weather the Uncertainties of Love – Brain Pickings”

“Love is the quality of attention we pay to things,” poet J.D. McClatchy wrote in his beautiful meditation on the contrast and complementarity of love and desire.
What we choose to attend to – our fear or our faith, our woundedness or our devotion to healing – determines the quality of our love.
“The alternations between love and its denial,” philosopher Martha Nussbaum observed in contemplating the difficulty of knowing ourselves, “Constitute the most essential and ubiquitous structural feature of the human heart.”
For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you.
All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life’s heart.
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;For love is sufficient unto love.
Complement it with Gibran on why we make art and his stunning love letters, then revisit Adrienne Rich on how honorable relationships refine our truths, Erich Fromm on the art of loving and what is keeping us from mastering it, Leo Tolstoy on love and its paradoxical demands, and this wondrous illustrated meditation on the many meanings and manifestations of love.

The orginal article.

Summary of “The Science Behind Happy and Healthy Relationships”

There’s no denying it: making and keeping happy and healthy relationships is hard.
A growing field of research into relationships is increasingly providing science-based guidance into the habits of the healthiest, happiest couples – and how to make any struggling relationship better.
As we’ve learned, the science of love and relationships boils down to fundamental lessons that are simultaneously simple, obvious and difficult to master: empathy, positivity and a strong emotional connection drive the happiest and healthiest relationships.
“The most important thing we’ve learned, the thing that totally stands out in all of the developmental psychology, social psychology and our lab’s work in the last 35 years is that the secret to loving relationships and to keeping them strong and vibrant over the years, to falling in love again and again, is emotional responsiveness,” says Sue Johnson, a clinical psychologist in Ottawa and the author of several books, including Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love.
According to Carrie Cole, director of research for the Gottman Institute, an organization dedicated to the research of marriage, emotional disengagement can easily happen in any relationship when couples are not doing things that create positivity.
In happy relationships, partners try to empathize with each other and understand each other’s perspectives instead of constantly trying to be right.
Ultimately, the quality of a person’s relationships dictates the quality of their life.
“Good relationships aren’t just happier and nicer,” says Johnson.

The orginal article.

Summary of “How To Get Over a Breakup, According to Science”

The person was asked to mull over the unfavorable aspects of their lover, like a particularly annoying habit.
In another prompt, called love reappraisal, people were told to read and believe statements of acceptance, like “It’s ok to love someone I’m not longer with.” Instead of fighting how they feel, they were told to accept their feelings of love as perfectly normal without judgment.
The researchers measured how positive or negative the people felt and how much love they felt for the ex using a scale and questionnaire.
Only people who looked at their lover in a negative light also had a decrease in feelings of love toward their ex.
Distraction, on the other hand, made people feel better overall, but had no effect on how much they still loved their ex-partner.
Love reappraisal showed no effect on either love or mood, but still dulled the emotional response to the photo.
Classifying love as a motivation is controversial in the field; other experts believe that love is an emotion, like anger, or a script, like riding a bike.
The endurance of love feelings, the complexity of these feelings and the intensity of infatuation all signal a motivation, the authors write.

The orginal article.

Summary of “The Cavaliers Wasted LeBron’s Finals Masterpiece”

In the moments after the Cavaliers beat the Celtics 87-79 on Sunday to advance to the NBA Finals, LeBron James was asked about leading this collection of teammates to basketball’s biggest stage.
LeBron squeezed as hard as he possibly could in Game 1 of the Finals against the Warriors on Thursday night, dropping 51 points on a 69.2 true shooting percentage to go with eight assists and eight rebounds.
It’ll be remembered largely for the wrong reason: LeBron’s 51 points are the most a player has ever scored as part of his team’s Finals loss.
By plays being “Taken away,” LeBron is referencing both missed calls-like when James cleanly stripped Kevin Durant but was whistled for a foul-and non-calls-like when LeBron got hacked on a drive midway through the fourth quarter but the action was allowed to continue.
Love logged 21 points, but shot only 1-for-8 from deep and missed countless open shots after LeBron had drawn attention from multiple Warriors and found him in space.
A deliberate approach and a LeBron masterpiece put the Cavs in position to win until the J.R. Smith debacle happened.
So the Cavs began to run more stagnant isolations because they had nowhere else to turn, and it worked, because the Cavaliers have LeBron James.
As Smith faced the music from a scrum of reporters, LeBron sat at his locker in deep thought; he may have been wondering if the Cavaliers have any more juice left to squeeze.

The orginal article.

Summary of “Jane Fonda: ‘I’m 80! I keep pinching myself. I can’t believe it!'”

Fonda isn’t even hugely interested in Cannes these days, not like back in the day “When people wore their own clothes and went there to talk about movies”.
If Book Club is a sort of geriatric Sex and the City, then Fonda plays the Samantha character, a leopardskin-clad businesswoman who schedules sex and won’t commit.
Jane Fonda was born in 1937, the daughter of the actor Henry Fonda, and while her life was socially privileged, her home life was agony, and her mother, Frances Ford Seymour, killed herself in a psychiatric hospital.
Fonda wants to produce a new version of the film, with younger actors, who now find their work life even more precarious on zero-hours contracts.
I have to say it: Jane Fonda looks stunning, immaculately coiffed and made up, and with the poise and elegance that has always been hers.
In the States, there are still people who boycott Jane Fonda’s films because of how deeply involved she got in protesting against the Vietnam war.
Having been married several times and lived with various partners, and recently split up with her last boyfriend, the music producer Richard Perry, Fonda now lives in a gated retirement enclave with her own house, but a shared community centre with a pool and tennis courts “Where I always see one or two other residents who seem infinitely older than I am, but they probably aren’t. I never thought I would ever live there, but it’s great.”
Fonda is unimpressed by the romance in many modern films.

The orginal article.